694  Real men?

Date: Thu, 15 Aug 2002 21:50:25 -0700
From: Sergio <cachafaz@ADELPHIA.NET>
Subject: Real men?

Astrid asks: "Is a real man in tango particularly male and macho ? Or is he
more sensitive
and caring than the general European idea of "real men", or anything
promoted in the Marlboro advertisements ?" What are "Real women" in tango?.

There is no doubt that a man in tango is male and macho. Tango is a product
of popular Argentine Culture, the same as Jazz, Fox-trot or Swing are
artistic manifestations of its American counterpart.
Tango in that sense, is a refleccion of Argentinean Spiritual values, values
that are to some extent still prevalent in an atenuated way.
To be Macho the Argentinean way is to be self confident, to be certain of
where a man stands and where he is going. He is in charge, he is reliable
and accepts responsibility. He cares for the well-being, safety and
happiness of his woman.

When walking on the side-walks he allows the lady the inner side, the side
closer to the wall and away from the street for her protection. He enters
the milonga holding her hand in a ceremonious way and allows her to walk in
front following the maitre to the table. There he grants her the area behind
the table as he sits to the side with his legs exposed. He pases his arm
accros her shoulders for everybody to know that he is in charge of all her
needs.

When dancing he acts with conviction, poised and certain of his rol, he
leads. He talks for some time awaiting to get the feeling of the music. He
initiates the embrace allowing her to decide how close she wishes to be. The
musics evokes in his mind the moves of the dance, he leads by transferring
that feeling to her. He is always in charge, moves through the floor
effortlessly, without interfering or disturbing the other couples. Navigates
with grace and determinatio. He makes sure that she is enjoying the moment.
He allows time for her artistic expression, is attentive to her spiritual
and physical needs.
After the music stops he holds her in his arms for a few more instants, like
the real treasure that she is. Then he walks slowly to the table allowing
her to walk in front. He pays for all the expenses, never allowing a lady to
pay for anything.
He is happy to be male, she is happy to be female. Both are equal in their
relatioship. They do not compete, rather cooperate, they walk hand in hand
helping and respecting each other. The strenght of the woman is in her
femeneity, something mysterious that the man treasures and respects. His
strenght is in his masculinity, something different that she also respects .
Yes, some Argentinean men may object to a woman taking a masculine rol. They
may strongly dislike such behavior. Most Argentinean. women will as well.
Tango then reflects the cultural elements of Argentinean society at the time
of its evolution. Even when some of those values are rapidly disappearing
they are still alive and prevalent in the tango world. It is my impression
that they are some of the strongest attractions to the modern couples, a
place where for an instant the man and the woman can still be masculine and
feminine without further consequences.

Date: Sat, 17 Aug 2002 23:04:36 +0900
From: astrid <astrid@RUBY.PLALA.OR.JP>
Subject: Re: Real men? (and a silly confession)

Sergio tells us:
He passes his arm

> accros her shoulders for everybody to know that he is in charge of all her
> needs.
>

He pays for all the expenses, never allowing a lady to

> pay for anything.
> Yes, some Argentinean men may object to a woman taking a masculine rol.

They

> may strongly dislike such behavior.

Thank you, Sergio. Now, sadly, I know, that I am an unlikely candidate for
the title of "a real lady"
whichever way you look at it, I am afraid. I went with a friend to a
milonga, paid my own way in, at some point we sat down, he put his arm
around me, I had my legs under the table hidden from sight and all that,
yes, but then I got up, walked across the room, and asked another man to
dance. He did not refuse.
This one here may be a hopeless case, but what other manners should a
properly behaved woman observe in Argentina, besides keeping her legs hidden
under the table, unless she enters the dance floor under the protection of
said Argentine gentleman, to expose 4/5 of her legs, via slit in skirt or
otherwise ??

Astrid

Date: Sat, 17 Aug 2002 09:34:08 -0500
From: Stephen Brown <Stephen.P.Brown@DAL.FRB.ORG>
Subject: Re: Real men? (and a silly confession)

As in all things, being a real man or a real woman calls for the proper
balance of yin (the feminine) and yang (the masculine)

Too much yang and the man is too abusive and controlling to be a good dance
partner. Too little yang, and he does not have the strength of heart to
lead or create the dance.

Too much yin and the woman is too weak to contribute to the
connection/interchange of tango. Too little yin, and she refuses to listen
to the lead.

With best regards,
Steve

Date: Sun, 18 Aug 2002 00:17:01 -0700
From: david hodgson <tangoman7@YAHOO.COM>
Subject: Re: Real Men?????

I am finding I need to add a few comments to the
melting pot.

"As in all things, being a real man or a real woman
calls for the proper balance of yin (the feminine) and
yang (the masculine)....................."

Comment: ????????????????????????????????


"Now, sadly, I know, that I am an unlikely candidate
for the title of "a real lady"................"

Comment: Thank you very much!!!!


"A "real man" is anyone with the appropriate equipment
between his legs, whether he leads, follows, dances
with men, women or both at the same time regardless of
where he was born and lives.........."

Comment: Can Drag Queens or people who were women and
have gone through a transformation be included.




=====
Ever thus to the Spirit of the Dance

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