648  The 'eye game' is very cool.

Date: Fri, 28 Jun 2002 22:30:28 -0700
From: Sergio <cachafaz@ADELPHIA.NET>
Subject: The 'eye game' is very cool.

The eye game has always been very cool. It has always existed in Argentina
and everywhere.
When two people are in the same physical place, there is a certain social
interaction. The other person notices you, her/his wandering eyes make a
subtle stop as they intersect your person. Her/his total expression,
demeanor, expresses interest, appreciation, pleasure or perhaps total
indifference, disgust, or even worse she/he does not see you, you are
transparent for her/him, her/his eyes see through you... whatever is behind
you but not you. If you show interest in her/him, she/he will make certain
that you understand that you result indifferent, neutral, disgusting ...a
real imposition. All this expressed by a non verbal language. So when you
are at a dance and a person does not like you, do not go and ask her/him to
dance. There are some people that do not like dancing with you, so do not
make them do it... for the experience is going to be a bad one. A failure, a
frustration. The necessary elements to build a good tango are going to be
absent. Will be like eating a salad without salt or a fruit that is not
ripe.
It is useless to dance unless the experience is wanted by both members of
the couple.
This said ...there are all sort of exceptions. Some people may have an
interest (kindness, altruism, economical) in making sure everybody present
is happy and dancing. I remember a place in Madrid (Spain) where the dancing
club had "public relations persons" whose occupation was to dance with
anyone that did not have partners. Cruise ships usually hire a number of men
with a similar objective.
It is important to make an effort not to be selfish and to try to dance with
persons that do not seem to be very active on the floor,... if you care at
all about them...this should be out of your free will, not an imposition.
We have to keep in mind that we go dancing to have fun. The dance floor is
like real life... attractions, reactions and rejections are expressed here
the same as there. ...then also... the milonga is a social event that offers
much more than dancing, it means going out, see friends, get to know people
and interact with them, sit, relax, have a drink, talk, listen to the
beautiful music, observe the couples that are dancing, ...and much more. It
is fun even if you do not dance much...