524  close embrace with taller woman

Date: Fri, 19 Apr 2002 13:12:40 -0500
From: Pamela Strateman <>
Subject: close embrace with taller woman

Rick asked, "is it possible to dance in close embrace with a
woman that is about 3-4 inches taller than you? I always
find it difficult and it doesn't look good."

It is indeed very possible. I've had wonderful times
dancing with men who were somewhat shorter or a fair bit
shorter than myself. This was certainly the case for me in
Argentina, where the men generally aren't all that tall.

I've also had problematic dances with shorter men.

Suggestions:

1. Stand up very straight, and keep your head erect.
Often when a shorter partner dances with his head tilted
down and to the left, my right hip winds up receiving the 10
to 15 pounds of his head weight with every step. By the end
of one tango, my right hip and leg are sore.

In contrast, I've danced with shorter men in Argentina who
stood up as straight and proud as peacocks. The lower part
of my torso connected with the upper part of theirs and it
all worked out fine.

2. Let her stand up straight. A problem I often encounter
is the man uses an overly firm grasp with his right arm on
my back. If he pulls down at all with his right arm, which
can easily happen unconsciously, I wind up either carrying
part of his weight, or having to crouch to dance.

The other hazard of the overly firm grasp occurs when
transitioning between certain movements. Let's say he leads
a turning rock step that uses bent knees. If he is holding
me too tight after the completion of the rock step, I won't
be able to unbend my knees. I may wind up having to crouch
for the rest of the dance. On the other hand, if his grasp
is light, or if he loosens it up after the step, then I'll
be able to slide back up through his arms when I return to a
more typical walking position.

I also believe that when a woman is taller than the man, she
needs to be careful to stand up straight and avoid leaning
too much. With a taller man, she may be able to have her
weight somewhat more forward, because her forward weight
matches his. With a shorter man, her forward weight might
act as a downward vector on him.

Hope this helps.
Pamela Strateman